Lili stirred, only to find herself bound to a medical bed with wide leather cuffs that bit into her skin. She blinked hard, trying to process where she was. The first thing that struck her first was the absence inside her.
“Lili,” said a voice from the corner. Margherita stepped forward with tablet in hand.
Lili’s lips felt cracked. “Why… the hell am I tied down?”
“Because the last time you were conscious, you scared the hell out of us all,” Margherita replied while tapping the tablet.
Lili turned her face away. “She was louder this time,” Lili muttered. “Like she was waking up with me.”
“And yet,” Margherita said, stepping closer, “you fought her and chose to be hit with the suppressor instead of losing control.”
“I don’t feel alive.”
“That’s the side effect of having your powers cut off. Your body’s still detoxing.”
Lili looked down at herself. Arms were trembling slightly under the restraints.
Margherita’s expression softened. “Rafael and Mike need answers. You’ve changed, Lili. The whatever mutation it is, it’s accelerating.”
Lili let out a humorless breath. “Well, I’m not exactly the one hoarding answers.” Then, after a hesitant pause she asked, “Did my parents… did they make any progress with the cure?”
Margherita hesitated. “They have ideas,” she admitted carefully. “They also want to try something. But I’m urging them to wait.”
“No.” Lili’s voice cut in sharp. She twisted slightly in her restraints. “They can test it on me. If there’s a chance, they have to try it. I’m not going to continue rotting while this thing turns me into one of them. I won’t become that.” Her voice cracked. “I don’t care what it costs me. Even if it means losing my powers. Even if it means losing… him.”
Margherita’s breath caught. “Lili—”
“To die,” she said, softer now, “isn’t half as terrifying as becoming one of those things. So let me be your experiment. If it fails, so what? At least I fought it until the end.”
Margherita moved to the side of the bed and gently laid a hand on Lili’s shoulder. “We’re not giving up on you,” she said. “But neither are we sacrificing you. That choice isn’t yours alone.”
Lili jerked under the restraints, her eyes flashed with the mix of grief, fear, shame. “Why is it not my choice alone?!” she snapped. “I’m the one fighting their influence, not you! Not anyone else!” She pulled against the cuffs again. Her voice dropped to half whisper. “I know what it means to fight the urge to hurt people you love. I know what it means to see everyone as a target just because some sick thing is whispering in your head.” Her eyes filled with tears she refused to let fall. “Does that sound normal to you? The moment you forget to suppress my powers again, the moment I slip, no one can tell what I’ll do next. So, “I’m not afraid of dying,” she whispered, more to herself than Margherita. “I’m afraid of not recognizing myself before it happens. Also, of hurting one of you, of looking into Notori’s eyes and not remembering why I ever loved him.” The restraints creaked softly. “I’d rather burn out by choice… than be devoured slowly by something wearing my face.”
Margherita stood still for a long moment. “I hear you,” she said at last. “And maybe it should be your choice. But just because you’re losing trust in yourself… doesn’t mean we are.”
“Jesus…” Lili whispered and her gaze broke, drifting sideways. Her breath trembled, then her shoulders did. And then the tear slipped past her barricade.
She turned her head away, but it was too late. More tears followed down her cheeks.
Her barely audible voice followed them. “I didn’t want to be this. I didn’t want any of this.” Her hands twitched within the restraints again. “I’m so tired,” she whispered.
A few hours passed in a strange silence. Lili hadn’t said much and Margherita hadn’t pushed. A knock followed soon after.
Margherita lifted her eyes from the monitor and straightened. “Come in,” she called gently.
Mike stepped in first with Rafael following close behind.
Lili didn’t turn her head to greet them. She kept her gaze fixed on the ceiling.
Rafael stopped near the end of the bed with hands clasped behind his back. Mike didn’t speak immediately either. He looked at Margherita first, then his eyes found Lili. “How are you feeling?” he finally asked.
Lili blinked slowly, then finally turned her head to meet his gaze. “Tired,” she honestly said.
Mike exhaled. Beside him, Rafael stepped closer, placing a steadying hand on the footboard of the bed.
“We need to talk,” Rafael said quietly. “About what happened… and what’s happening to you.”
“Then you’re asking the wrong person.” Lili replied sharply. “The longer I stayed near those shadows… the faster I wanted to let them in.” Her eyes flared with bruise between horror and hunger. “And the whispers…” She looked at both of them. “They told me I didn’t need to fight. That I belonged with them. That if I just gave in, I’d finally feel peace.” She shook her head slightly, the restraints clinking faintly against the bedframe. “It’s getting harder to tell if they’re lying.”
Mike exchanged a long, silent glance with Rafael.
“But I didn’t let them win,” she whispered. “That’s why I told you to use the power suppressor. I knew it would work.” Her eyes locked with Rafael’s. “And now I’m asking you to do the same with the cure my parents are researching. Don’t wait until it’s too late.”
“We hear you, Lili,” Rafael said calmly and exhaled slowly. “We’ve already taken steps. The shadow we managed to capture during the breach… Your parents and Margherita are preparing to test the cure on him first.” Lili’s gaze trembled. “We’re not going to gamble with your life,” Rafael continued. “If this cure is going to save you, we’ll make damn sure it won’t kill you first.”
Mike added quietly, “You’re not a test subject.”
Lili closed her eyes for a heartbeat. One tear escaped, trailing silently down her temple. “Then hurry,” she whispered. “Because I don’t know how long I can keep it out.”
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